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I come from a broken family. My "real" father left me and my siblings at a young age. My mother had no means to support us. She grew up thinking that getting married was the only way to be supported. She dated various men that I later came to find out had been inappropriate to my sister but she hadn't really done much to solve those situations. Later after truly not being able to support her kids she had left myself and siblings with our grandparents. Who also were not equipped to raise these lost children. In that time she had met my now step dad. We later came back to meet him and he was not a pleasant man who had no idea how to be a father or raise children and made zero effort to learn how to. He would later molest me for years. At first I had no idea what was going on but later it had spiraled into something I had no control over. Knowing if this man left our family, we would all find ourselves again in a financial and broken family. At times I felt like I had to take one for the team and for my Mom. My mom had her suspicions and confronted me but I was ashamed, afraid, alone. I set myself financially, graduated college and left the horrible home I was in where I was told what to do well into my early 20's. This man is still in my Mother's life in my life. I had put the secret away made amends with it. So I thought. I married, have a child and now so many buried feelings have resurfaced. I have never told a soul. I don't know what will happen if I do. I will feel more distraught but I cannot open this deep secret. It will destroy me I am too weak and again must keep silent.