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Recently, I've come to the resolution that the reason why I'm failing to recover over the years is that, I'm so scared of not being Depressed. I have always been, and it scares me that it has become a core aspect of my personality. So I wrote this letter to my beloved, my Depression: “You are my only constant. 
You never leave my side. When all else failed, you were here to stay. You’ve always been faithful to me. We grew up together, learned about the world together. You’ve been there to catch me through every heartbreak, tough lesson and experience. You know me inside out. We traveled around together, we loved, laughed and got hurt together. You know how to give me space when I ask for it, yet you’re always watching over me. A signal is all it takes to have you back by my side, you’re never too proud to let my attempts to push you away stop you, or give in to the walls I try to build. You kept me company through nights that made sleep seem like worthless time spent away from you, and waited patiently for me when I’d sleep for half a day, refusing to come back. You’ve made it hard to love others, you made trust sound like a child’s tale. You have left your mark on all parts of me, on all of the persons I once thought I were. You’ve become the lens I see the world through. I’ve known no stronger impact than that of yours. I’m grateful for it all. I mean it when I say that I love you, and that it scares me to picture a world of mine without you in it. You’re part of me, all of me. But you see, I’ve grown to learn that there is more out there, and it’s suffocating me to think of all that I’ve missed out on as I cling in fear to you. I’ve recently learned about possibilities and hope, and I have to say, I’m intrigued. This is a kind request for you to let me go. I know how hard it is, and trust me when I say that it is no easier on me. But I think it’s about time we separate. I want to grow, live and get to meet my wholest self. And I’m afraid I cannot embark on this journey with you along. I need to find out for myself how it’s like to be alone, free of the shackles of you. I know you will never stop trying to reach out, and I know that I’d be lured by the familiarity of you and everything we’ve been through. But I pray to all the Gods out there that I eventually find the strength in me to resist thinking of you, every time I fidget in my bed at 4am. I pray that the life I strive for would reveal to me your true colors. Truth is, you’ve stuck yourself to me like a leach, sucking the life out of me. Telling me that I cannot exist without you, hypnotizing me, paralyzing me. But I refuse to longer let you. You see, it is me who is in control now.”